Insatiably Unsatisfied

And this is the condemnation: that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. John 3:19 KJV

Evil – Jewish psychology revolves around the power to choose. In spite of the fact that Freud was a Jew, the Jewish theology of the self is not consumed with inner uncontrollable subconscious forces. Rather, it is focused on the training of conscious decisions. In the end, it really doesn’t matter what caused the present circumstances or where the conflict originated. In the end what matters is what we do now, in this moment of choice. To understand the elements present in choice we must understand the nature of the yetzer ha’ra, and the first thing we need to know about this ever-present inclination toward self-fulfillment is that it is not evil!

Yes, it’s true that yetzer ha’ra is often translated as “inclination toward evil.” After all, ra is the Hebrew word for “evil.” But we should not think of yetzer ha’ra in terms of base immorality or heinous corruption. What the yetzer ha’ra describes is really the motivating power behind the intention to manipulate life situations so that they produce fulfillment in the world as I wish it to be. In other words, yetzer ha’ra is the reason that I work, play, scheme, dream and alter my circumstances to fit my needs. I want to eat well so I work hard to have sufficient funds for a great meal and a good wine. I want to enjoy sex so I search for a willing woman to make my wife. I want the joy of children so I seek marriage. I want shelter so I construct a house (or buy one). I want pleasure so I save for a vacation in the Bahamas. You can add any number of other personal goals to the list. What motivates these choices and their subsequent behaviors is the desire to have the world “my way” (as Frank would croon). There is nothing inherently evil in this motivating power. In fact, the yetzer ha’ra is essential for life. It is what makes us human beings, at least it is part of what makes us human beings. Any attempt to remove or destroy the yetzer ha’ra, as if there is something sinful about it, results in the destruction of the self. And despite the passage about picking up your cross and denying yourself, nothing in Scripture suggests that self-denial means self-destruction.

The conflict with the yetzer ha’ra is essentially a conflict about ends, not means. Left unbridled, the yetzer ha’ra will naturally seek its own ends, that is, what satisfies and pleases me! But the word of the Lord requires something more, something beyond my own personal ends, in order for me to experience life in the Spirit and the consummation of YHVH’s design. What it requires is that I bend this energy to serve an end greater than myself. I must bridle my yetzer ha’ra so that it serves the yetzer ha’tov, the inclination to what is good. Oh, and by the way, the yetzer ha’tov is not determined by what I think is good. Good is defined by God and by God alone (see Micah 6:8). The end of the yetzer ha’tov is the service of the King. Anything else falls in the realm of the yetzer ha’ra.

The theory is clear enough. It is the application that pinches the nerve of power.

Topical Index: evil, yetzer ha’ra, John 3:19

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laurita hayes

Perfect. Thank you for being so succinct. It makes it so much easier to explain to others! Ya gotta serve somebody! It may be the devil, or it may be the Lord, but you gotta serve somebody!

What is serving the devil? All his temptations revolve around serving self. Serving self is serving him. How is this? Because My Way is an illusion. A fabrication. A mirage. Yes, we were created with an ego. No the ego is not bad. The ego (which I have determined is man’s made-up term to describe the yetzer ha-ra) is set up to measure only one thing. Love. The ego is insatiable because it needs love. It wants strokes and warm fuzzies and attention. All the time. That is not wrong. I am supposed to love myself. The ego is set up to measure whether or not I am obeying that. I think the trouble comes when we confuse what love is. If I am not loving myself properly I am a sucking black hole for sin; a sucker for trouble, because I have to have love, or I die. The consequence of not being loved is death. The orphanages of Romania are Exhibit A for this.

What is loving myself? It is NOT serving myself! Loving myself is making sure my needs (not my wants, necessarily) are being met. What are my needs? ALL, all my needs are to be found in my Father. Even the need for my own attention must come through Him before it works for me. If I do not take care of myself, I am disobeying, but that care has to come from His hand. If it originates with me, I am in self-idolatry. Why? Because I think we are hard-wired to worship all Sources. If I perceive I am a source, I am going to be afraid of myself. Yes. Fear. We are afraid of everything we think provides for our needs. If I turn to ANY OTHER SOURCE for my needs, even the need I have for my own care and attention, I am in idolatry; fear; of that source. To serve myself, then, will always be at the expense of being afraid of myself, which will eventually ripen into hatred. I know, I know, this is weird. I have had to live it to believe it myself. Not taught in psychology books, for sure, but they are full of attempts to describe the results.

What does it mean to take care of my own needs through Him? Ahh. There is the mystery. I am working hard right now to learn what that is! How do I stay out of drivenness and performance for love, even the love I am commanded to ‘have’ for myself? Well, love comes only from one place, and that place is not me. The motivation to brush my teeth or even wash my hands, must become obedience. Obedience. The laws of self care serve to give me a chance to take care of me IN OBEDIENCE to commands. What happens then? I am connected to the Love Source in that obedience, and I feel loved while I am brushing my teeth! I know I am pleasing Him! Still working on it!

Derek S

Very interesting. It makes sense, essentially it’s the Jacob Esau struggle that happens in us. I heard a theory that it wasn’t that Jacob actually deceived Issac, it was actually Issac knew full well it was Jacob. It was that Esau had the power to get things done while Jacob only studied (brains vs power/motivation). Once Isaac sensed that Jacob was willing to ‘get things done’ ie dressing up as Esau ie merging both into one, Isaac gave the blessing knowing that Jacob could use both.

Might have botched the theory a bit but I thought it was interesting.

robert lafoy

What does it mean to take care of my own needs through Him?

Good question, perhaps part of the question could be asking myself if my “indulgence” costs others or benefits others. Washing our hands is a good example.
Jonathan Sacks wrote a piece I really appreciated where he described the lines of delineation between people as intersecting each person, as opposed to the line being drawn between two persons. It creates a space that is “potential” instead of defining the space we have ordained for ourselves. Pretty interesting stuff, in fact, very biblical stuff. 🙂 I wash my hands for my health, but I benefit others by doing so.

YHWH bless you and keep you.

laurita hayes

“I wash my hands for health, but I benefit others by doing so.”

Like.

Jamie Rindt

Do you have an email I can ask you something personal that I don’t want on-line?