Altered States
So Rachel said, “With mighty wrestlings I have wrestled with my sister, and I have indeed prevailed.” And she named him Naphtali. Genesis 30:8 NASB
Mighty – What a tangled verse! Avraham Weiss translates Rachel’s statement as “I wrestled with God and prevailed.” But you won’t find that in English. Instead, English translators interpret elohim as “mighty.” The Hebrew is naphtule elohim niphtalti. Onkelos, the Aramaic translator, considers prayer a form of wrestling, that is, “complete entanglement of one’s whole self with another – with the Other.”[1] Jewish translators view Rachel’s real struggle as wrestling with God, not with her sister. So elohim is translated as we find it in most of its occurrences. The NASB only makes a marginal note about this, and leaves the translation with a lot less impact. Weiss notes that tefilla (prayer) is an “anagram of petila, meaning twisting or wrestling.”[2] He notices that real prayer is being bound, twisted around, by the presence of God. The purpose of prayer is to feel God’s presence—and that often requires enormous struggle and exhausting effort. Perhaps that’s why we avoid it.
Let’s pause for a moment and think about prayer. The quick definition is grossly inadequate. Yes, prayer is conversation with God, but that hardly captures what actually occurs when prayer becomes real. Perfunctory prayer maintains the nice border between control and chaos. It keeps God in heaven and allows us to take charge of the earth. But perfunctory prayer is infinitely unsatisfying because we do not experience what we most desire—the presence of the Creator. We say our prayers while resisting ego destruction. We maintain our crafted identities by rejecting the pressure of the Spirit to wrestle with God. Our prayers are nice, proper spiritual etiquette. They are a long, long way from the agony of sweating drops of blood in struggle with the Father. And as a result, they are a long, long way from face-down encounter. We desperately want the presence of God while we desperately cling to control. We know the person at the brook Jabbok will overcome us so we stay away from the water’s edge. And we feel lost.
What if we did enter the fight? What if we decided to expose our real emptiness to God? What if we stopped trying to control things and released all those emotions into the night? Would we die? Would we be any worse than we are now—pretenders? Would it be so terrible to have God’s hand cripple us? Then, at least we would know we met Him. How can we expect to have our names changed if we bow our heads and fold our hands instead of battling, fighting, grunting, scraping and losing! Would it really be so bad to lose a fight with God? Do you think He will touch us without wrestling?
Prayer is the great obstacle to faith. As we imagine it, faith should be clear, neatly organized, doctrinally correct, capable of rational articulation and, more than anything else, emotionally controlled. But that isn’t biblical faith. That is faith in our own reasonable conclusions about God examined from a distance. When we get close, it all falls apart and then we realize that faith is encounter—encounter with someone who is not subject to our rules of engagement, who is not civil or polite. Faith is devastation at the hands of the Creator. It is unraveling.
No wonder we keep prayer in a box.
Topical Index: prayer, wrestling, Genesis 30:8, tefilla, petila, Avraham Weiss
[1] Avraham Weiss, Holistic Prayer: A Guide to Jewish Spirituality, p. xiv.
[2] Ibid., p. xiii.
Oh devastate me Yaweh! Oh how I crave that touch be it painful or pleasure to me just to know I have His attention.
I find that it is those times of desperation where I am wrestling with God in some area of my life that He begins to untangle something in me. It usually is not pleasant. It usually means that the tangling I am living in is something that makes me feel secure and stable but is also the thing thing that is keep me from moving closer to God. It is scary and difficult. Very scary at times.
Skip,( etal. ) in my elderly years, I am walking “alone” so desperately in need of God’s touch. My grown aging, professional too busy children do not live near me, and actually I try NOT to call on them unless absolutely necessary. Sometimes it even complicates things as their are more than one! I have for forty years been so blessed by the touches of the Almighty God, the Creator of the Universe; but it always seems I need His presence again and again. This week has been UNREAL. Today, Sat. I was able to, during the night to “wrestle” in REAL Prayer. I am not sure how the outcome will be; but I was able to fall asleep about five a.m. and sleep until 10:00 a.m. awakened with peace, and the ability to get up and open the blinds and see the sunshine and stagger to the commuter. I intended to write my son on one issue of many that has to have real attention, and only mention and address that issue to him- all about preparing to sale my old 1929 home, with its many issues. And a contract pending when it has not been listed yet. and the buyer moving here, and his wife has not even seen it. They have four young children, and she is paranoid over the thoughts of it. the realtors fighting over who gets the contract! and I am trying to get the work done with contractors. AND IN ALL THIS, SKIP, I THINK THIS HEBREW WORD IS PERHAPS ONE OF THE BEST THAT I HAVE EVER READ! AND YES, I AM YELLING WITH THE CAPITAL LETTERS. THE LORD HAS BLESSED THIS ARTICLE. LaVaye Billings
Ms. Billings,
My heart goes out to you, and my prayers today will be for you.
Maybe Skip has some connections and the ability to put you in touch w/someone in this community who can help you sort these things out. I talk to people on the phone all day, every day who are in the midst of overwhelming life events and i hear so often how much someone listening has helped them sort it out.
I smiled at your yelling. Good for you. It clears the lungs and gets the blood flowing. bp
bp wade, thank you so much for responding. Your prayers helped . I ended up with a good day, before I had finished writing this a.m., an e-mail popped in from our son in Tucson, and when I left Skip’s I read it. And we ( I still refer to the children as “we, our” ) as that is what I did when my husband was alive, and without him; there would be no children! The news from him was that he had thirty minutes previously had his second grandchild a girl via emergency C-section. And his wife and him would fly to Tampa, Florida tomorrow and stay a week. That makes ten great grandchildren for me/us. They are welcome and in good families and that is wonderful. I held the last one born in Aug. and was four weeks old when his aunt had a wedding Sept. 12. and they brought him to the wedding, and all the events before & after that lasted five days. The perfect little baby boy slept through most of it, and when I held him at the pool party in my lap for about 45 minutes he held one of my fingers all the time. That was so precious. Our family is so scattered that when there is a wedding, everyone tries to come and make it a family reunion, too. A bit extravagant for me; but always great to be able to get most of us together. 32 descendants including the spouses.
No, I do not need a person to help me, I really must be kept moving by me, getting and keeping workers that are good, honest, reliable is difficult. But I must remember that how I work with them is a testimony to God’s Love for them, too. At my age dealing with too many people is a terrible drainage on me, as I think slower, move that way, and can’t hear all that much- even with hearing aids.
But the Lord has been so faithful to help me get through each day and gives me peace in the night. At times like the one I wrote about above, it was a real test of my determination to “fight – wrestle through all of the garbage and not quit”. I truly believe that to be willing to die when our time is ready we must have endured must sorrow and hardships; if God allowed our lives to continue to be good, we would not want to leave this world. So indeed it is a preparation as we keep on “seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness”. And to remember to give thanks in all things.
And a reminder of the value of our prayers, look up Revelation 8, v.3-through a few verses, Our prayers will be in the vials ( some translations say, bowls, etc.) to God himself. All true prayers are valuable ! LaVaye Billings
Thank-you for sharing and contributing. I keep reading and thinking “How can I not JUST read, but also APPLY these devotions to my own gritty life?”
As a youngster growing up in the 50’s watching tag team wrestling matches with “Dick the Bruiser” and “Cowboy Bob Ellis” on our small black and white TV I was enthralled. It apparently influenced me more than I thought, as my prayer life is similarly full of gusto and showmanship, but sadly, it too, is just for the entertainment of an audience. If my yetzer hara starts to be defeated – it tags the ego to take its place in the ring. Back and forth … TAG; “a tale
told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
signifying nothing”. In those TV tag team wrestling matches only by rare accident did someone injure or get injured -just like in my real prayer life. DING. Round 64 of a scheduled 70 (if by strength-80) round bout. DING, DING ….sigh.
bp wade, thank you so much for responding. Your prayers helped . I ended up with a good day, before I had finished writing this a.m., an e-mail popped in from our son in Tucson, and when I left Skip’s I read it. And we ( I still refer to the children as “we, our” ) as that is what I did when my husband was alive, and without him; there would be no children! The news from him was that he had thirty minutes previously had his second grandchild a girl via emergency C-section. And his wife and him would fly to Tampa, Florida tomorrow and stay a week. That makes ten great grandchildren for me/us. They are welcome and in good families and that is wonderful. I held the last one born in Aug. and was four weeks old when his aunt had a wedding Sept. 12. and they brought him to the wedding, and all the events before & after that lasted five days. The perfect little baby boy slept through most of it, and when I held him at the pool party in my lap for about 45 minutes he held one of my fingers all the time. That was so precious. Our family is so scattered that when there is a wedding, everyone tries to come and make it a family reunion, too. A bit extravagant for me; but always great to be able to get most of us together. 32 descendants including the spouses.
No, I do not need a person to help me, I really must be kept moving by me, getting and keeping workers that are good, honest, reliable is difficult. But I must remember that how I work with them is a testimony to God’s Love for them, too. At my age dealing with too many people is a terrible drainage on me, as I think slower, move that way, and can’t hear all that much- even with hearing aids.
But the Lord has been so faithful to help me get through each day and gives me peace in the night. At times like the one I wrote about above, it was a real test of my determination to “fight – wrestle through all of the garbage and not quit”. I truly believe that to be willing to die when our time is ready we must have endured must sorrow and hardships; if God allowed our lives to continue to be good, we would not want to leave this world. So indeed it is a preparation as we keep on “seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness”. And to remember to give thanks in all things.
And a reminder of the value of our prayers, look up Revelation 8, v.3-through a few verses, Our prayers will be in the vials ( some translations say, bowls, etc.) to God himself. All true prayers are valuable ! LaVaye Billings
Beloved sister, LaVaye Billings, I am sure many at this community are keeping you in prayers before ABBA for all your needs, and for strength for all you are going through.
Thank you for sharing and taking the time and effort to keep us updated, and, for your wisdom through hardship and experience.
YHWH bless, keep you and His shalom upon you. Shalom and love.
bp wade, thank you so much for responding. Your prayers helped . I ended up with a good day, before I had finished writing this a.m., an e-mail popped in from our son in Tucson, and when I left Skip’s I read it. And we ( I still refer to the children as “we, our” ) as that is what I did when my husband was alive, and without him; there would be no children! The news from him was that he had thirty minutes previously had his second grandchild a girl via emergency C-section. And his wife and him would fly to Tampa, Florida tomorrow and stay a week. That makes ten great grandchildren for me/us. They are welcome and in good families and that is wonderful. I held the last one born in Aug. and was four weeks old when his aunt had a wedding Sept. 12. and they brought him to the wedding, and all the events before & after that lasted five days. The perfect little baby boy slept through most of it, and when I held him at the pool party in my lap for about 45 minutes he held one of my fingers all the time. That was so precious. Our family is so scattered that when there is a wedding, everyone tries to come and make it a family reunion, too. A bit extravagant for me; but always great to be able to get most of us together. 32 descendants including the spouses.
No, I do not need a person to help me, I really must be kept moving by me, getting and keeping workers that are good, honest, reliable is difficult. But I must remember that how I work with them is a testimony to God’s Love for them, too. At my age dealing with too many people is a terrible drainage on me, as I think slower, move that way, and can’t hear all that much- even with hearing aids.
But the Lord has been so faithful to help me get through each day and gives me peace in the night. At times like the one I wrote about above, it was a real test of my determination to “fight – wrestle through all of the garbage and not quit”. I truly believe that to be willing to die when our time is ready we must have endured much sorrow and hardships; if God allowed our lives to continue to be good, we would not want to leave this world. So indeed it is a preparation as we keep on “seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness”. And to remember to give thanks in all things.
And a reminder of the value of our prayers, look up Revelation 8, v.3-through a few verses, Our prayers will be in the vials ( some translations say, bowls, etc.) to God himself. All true prayers are valuable ! LaVaye Billings
You are so welcome and i’m glad you responded, i thought about you frequently today and prayed each time.
Grand babies are the best, i agree, and congratulations!
Keeps up posted so we can refine our prayers as the need arises, ok?
Agreed!! Very profound Skip!! REAL – TALK!!
Thanks and Praise Yah
Michael
I can see how wrestlings can be a form of prayer considering the spelling of prayer (tefillah). It does seem these are “wrestlings of God” with which Rachel prevailed over Leah. I want to know what the content of Rachel’s prayers was. How did she present her case to Elohim? I see her prayers more as a court battle. Did she go back to how her father deceived Jacob and gave Leah to him instead of her in the beginning? Did the petition include what she considered was fair or not fair? How much of her cultural status as a childless woman and the need for a surrogate come into play in this battle as she presented her case before Elohim? How frequently did she cry out before her prayers were heard and answered with a child? When we are faced with adversity or what we feel is unfair, how do we pray? Do we bring a well-organized petition to the Father or do we just whine and complain? If God is a judge, shouldn’t we bring the former? Shouldn’t we make sure our case includes appropriate support from the law He gave us? I think it should and I’d be reminding Him multiple times until the battle was won.
Like.