The Acid Test
Search me, O God, and know my heart. Try me, and know my thoughts Psalm 139:23
Try Me – “bekhaneni,” says the Psalmist. The verbal root (bakhan) is direct, powerful and compelling. Put me to the test. Prove me. Throw me in the crucible of life’s fire and see if I emerge refined and pure. If you thought asking God to perform heart surgery was insane, just imagine what is implied in this!
Let me tell you a secret. The measure of God’s trust in you is determined by the amount of trials and hardships He allows you to bear for His glory. God knows exactly how much we can take before we break. God is not interested in crushing us. He is interested in providing us with just the right amount of testing so that we can emerge victorious, glorifying Him. He doesn’t need to see how much we can handle on our own. That is never His plan. He wants us to learn the exact measure of our total dependence. We’ll need to know this when we assume our roles in His eternal plan. Now is the time to find out just how much we can’t handle.
God promises never to give you more than is essential for your perfect growth. He promises to always provide an exit door leading straight to Him. But remember, no pain – no gain. Stop praying to be removed from trials and heartaches. Don’t you know that they are precisely what is needed for your painful growth? Stop asking God for the easy path. Don’t you realize that if He grants your request He will have to shelter you from all you needed to become like Him? Why are you so intent on finding a way out when you should be pleading for God to give you a way in – into the via Delarosa – the way of the cross? Your perfection cannot be accomplished until the nails are driven home.
Did Jesus plead to avoid the hard way? Did He beg God to give Him peace and tranquility? Not a chance. He knew that the pathway of obedience was bloody.
When you’re ready (or, maybe, when you feel the least ready), say this – bekhaneni. Try me! Ask God to bring it on. Tell Him you want to be all that He wants you to be. Give Him the green light for proving your worth. He honors that kind of prayer. In fact, nothing pleases Him more. What is devoted to destruction is sacred in His sight.
