The Angels Have Waited
The Angels Have Waited
Woke up midnight
Crying empty tears
No one sees
No one hears
The angels have waited
Time to go home
So far away
Can’t remember when
There were
No empty days
Life without you
Held back too long
The floodgates are open
Water’s all gone
Woke up sorrow
The world has its way
Leaves us crying
Nothing more to say
The angels have waited
Soon to have their day
I am road worn. This is my 75th day on the road in the last 122. Tomorrow I head home from El Salvador, only to turn around the next week and travel once more to Evansville. Five more days gone in the next thirteen.
I sat on the chair by the Pacific Ocean, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughan singing “Life Without You,” and cried. I am tired, lonely and alone. I miss Rosanne more than I can say. I ache for her. Even as I write these words, there are more tears. I want to go home.
“It is not good for man to be alone.”
Salt sorrow slides down my cheeks, reminding me that there is much more to this than days away from her comfort. I miss my ‘ezer. I need her protection. Being on the road has its own special terrors. I miss her nourishment. She cooks better than any meal in a restaurant because she cooks with her love (go watch the movie Like Water For Chocolate and you will understand). She nourishes me with her soul. I miss her care. I miss holding her hand. I miss hearing her talk, seeing her face, smelling her perfume. Missing her reminds me of the deeper emptiness in my life.
I miss my father. He died some years ago. I never really got to know him. He had a hard life and did the best he could, but, like me, he was a road warrior. There is an empty place in my life that only he could fill. No more. I’ll have to wait until I arrive.
I miss my children, those that I brought into the world, and those that I share with Rosanne. I don’t know any of them deeply enough. They are becoming strangers as the road eats me up and spits out pieces of my soul, scattered across three continents. What I have left to give probably isn’t enough for them. It’s not enough for me.
I miss my Lord. I know He is with me, but I long for face-to-face conversation. ” Lord, I don’t need to see your glory. I just need to see your smile.” I want Him to hold me, just once. I want Him to take my hand and sit with me, just so I know I am not walking by myself. Now I am really crying. No one can fill this emptiness except Him. I just want to go home.
Stevie Ray is right. Life without you – fill in any of the people you love. There is more than enough reason to want to go home, isn’t there?
“The angels have waited, now they’ll have their day. Fly away home, fly away.”
Tomorrow I’ll board one more airplane and make one more trip, but I know that I am reaching the end. My Master and my friend still sends me out, but it gets harder to go. There is a special agony that comes with being sent. It is joy mixed with sorrow – the way of life in this world. Someday He will wipe away the tears, but not tonight. Tonight I just want to go home. I can imagine that He felt the same way. It’s hard to live here when we know that we really don’t belong.
Tomorrow is Passover. The angel of death will be restrained once more. God will call His children into the wilderness to worship Him. We will remember that He redeemed us when we cried out to Him. So, tonight, cry with me for all those you miss. Weep with me because there is still loneliness. Worship Him with tears. And wait – wait to get home when the tears will be gone at last.
El Salvador, 8 April 2009
Dear Skip,
I read your note which you wrote sitting on a chair by the Pacific ocean. I am reading your note on this side of the Pacific ocean in Singapore sitting in a coffee shop – and I want to cry with you.
Your note is a heart-cry – given your punishing travel schedule, it seems to be taking its toll on you, more than you can bear.
We love you and pray for you – that you soon return to your shalom rest – that rest by the still waters that Psalm 23 talks about.
Dont feel alone – be reminded of each of Today’s Word readers who every day eagerly and earnestly look forward to your exposition – to be refreshed and nourished by the Word.
Each of us appreciate your labor of love – thanks for all that you are doing.
With love and prayers,
Your servant-brother,
John B. Samuel
Singapore
Thanks for sharing with us a perspective very few of us not involved in such a ministry realize. The cost of following the Lord is high, although rewarding for sure.
But then there’s the human element, which takes a back seat to an often lonely ride
Thanks for being human and wanting to share your glory and humanness with us all.
HAPPY EASTER! HE IS RISEN!
Thanks for being you. You have ment more to far more than you can ever realize. Please come home and take a rest.
I have often thought that when I get to heaven if I can only get close enough to Jesus to touch the hem of his coat, from then on every thing will be OK.
You are honored. You have inspired prayer for you, prayer for me and prayer for this country.
May the Lord continue to bless you and wrap His arms around you to ease the loneliness you feel as you follow His calling for your discipleship. God bless you. You give us clarity and understanding of His Holy Word. As we celebrate this Holy Week moving towards Easter Sunday and the Resurrection of our Lord and Saviour, we send you our love and best wishes for a HAPPY EASTER!
Skip,
Your angels have waited was so heart wrenching and I want you to know that I’m praying for you today. I am so selfish as I wake up in anticipation of “todays word” and go to sleep with Spiritual Restoration and I don’t even thank God for the author and pray for his strength and stamina. I will pray that God will speak to you so clearly that there will be no doubt what you are to do and where you are to go and how many classes you are to teach. I know you love teaching and I am so blessed to sit and hear God’s word the way it was intended through the Hebrew perspective but maybe God is leading in another way and although I would be so sad to say goodbye to the Psalms class, I will need to be obedient to God’s leading as well! Safe travel home and I look forward to seeing you on the 14th unless you need to cancel which we would understand!
I appreciate all of you, and I will just keep going, but tomorrow I think I’ll sleep. 🙂
Isn’t it nice to know that God loves our emotions.
Skip
Thank you for your honesty. I will be praying for you and your family. I am sure they all feel the strain, as well. In your weakness, Skip, He is strong. I felt like the Lord had this Psalm for you:
Protect me, God, for I take refuge in You.
I said to the LORD, “You are my Lord;
I have no good besides You.”
As for the holy people who are in the land,
they are the noble ones in whom is all my delight.
The sorrows of those who take another [god]
for themselves multiply;
I will not pour out their drink offerings of blood,
and I will not speak their names with my lips.
LORD, You are my portion
and my cup [of blessing];
You hold my future.
The boundary lines have fallen for me
in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.
I will praise the LORD who counsels me
even at night my conscience instructs me.
I keep the LORD in mind always.
Because He is at my right hand,
I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad,
and my spirit rejoices;
my body also rests securely.
For You will not abandon me to Sheol;
You will not allow Your Faithful One to see the Pit.
You reveal the path of life to me;
in Your presence is abundant joy;
in Your right hand are eternal pleasures.
Blessings,
Glory
BTW, that was Psalm 16
Thanks, sounds like I should use Psalm 16 for a Today’s Word pretty soon.
Skip:
Your expression is my expression. We are like minded in Christ Jesus. I am moved by your heart and the weariness that comes with serving our Lord and serving others. I, like you, am desperate for the Living God. I cry, like you, for His loving arms to wrap around me….even just once if I could feel it. Today, at this moment, as I hear your cry and write this note of love, I recall Colossians 3:4 “When Christ who is our life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory.”
Prayerfully, a sister in Christ.
Kelly
Skip, having traveled some early in my career, and on a cognitive level, I can relate and appreciate your longing to be home. I can understand but not fully appreaciate the emotional impact travel has on you. I will pray for God’s rejuvinating spirit, His peace and His joy to come upon you and to stay with you. That you may not only survive, but thrive in a joy as He continues to lead you to places where He uses you.
Skip as the angels were sent to minister to Jesus before His death likewise may our awesome yeshu’ah be your strength, deliverence, and rescue. This is what the body of Christ is all about sharing sorrow, too.
I don’t have the words, just the thanks for your words.
Anthony
May Adonai YHWH, Elohim of Israel, let His Spirit fall upon you.
May you feel His radiance and glory.
Cast your pain and aching spirit upon Him,
That He may sooth your aching spirit with the joy of the living GOD.
May the eternal peace that Mashiach gives, free your soul.
May you find just reward for your service to Him.
And now,
May YHW bless you and keep you.
May YHWH make His face to shine upon you.
May YHWH lift His countenance upon you, and give you shalom… Amen and amen!
Dear Skip and forever family- It is with great joy I write this to all. I am looking back at the past few years of interaction with “today’s word”, and I see a familiar pattern. This is not the first time G-d has done this. We know G-d does not use anything or anybody without “the breaking process.” But even knowing this doesn’t make it less painful. Every Christian bi-ped, male and female, rich, poor, Jew or Gentile, north of the equator or south will “suffer” tribulation. But we (all) also know G-d does nothing random-, He is purposeful (and perfect) in all things. “all things?” And we (all) answer in the affirmative, all things, at all times, and in every place. G-d is good.
In the Hebrew hymnal, our dear brother and father David somehow knew “it is good for me that I have been afflicted.” “No pain- no gain” is not new. No one- no one gets through this life scar free. Your words brother Skip have weight with us because of your wounds. Because of your scars you have authority when you speak. You are a “been there-done that” kind of guy. Your tears and your prayers show up in your words that flow from a broken heart. You have become and are still becoming one of G-d’s “wounded healers.”
We who also have the same afflictions and wounds are listening now more intently and with a different mindset. We see the “vanity” Solomon referred to at the outset of his analysis of our human condition, but we (all) also now know of Someone far greater than Solomon. Maybe this could be the title of Rick Warren’s next book: “Purpose Driven Vanity.”
But our Father’s instruction manual states, “we are more than conquerors through Him that loved us.” During this Easter weekend as we pause and remember the exquisite Sacrifice of the Savior for us, we the receivers of G-d’s blessings through you, will pray to the Giver of all good things and the Lover of our souls for your refreshment and renewal in Him. Thank you brother Skip for what G-d has done through you in my life. There is a man in Memphis who is changed because of you. Your labors in the LORD are not in vain, and our great G-d who cannot lie has also promised:
Isaiah 55:10 For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:
Isaiah 55:11 So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void [unfruitful], but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.
In Christ, carl
As a former and still sometimes road-warrior, I feel your pain. There is nothing like home whether your road has you staying in nice hotels with 500 count sheets and a turn-down service or you are staying in one of the poorest places on Earth. Your family awaits you, in fact, they never really left you – hence your longing. Yours is their longing, for together in person. YHWH and His Son, our Counselor is with you, He never left you. Yet, He too longs for that in Person meeting where He can give you that assurance and rest all of us long for. Yeshua is here among you, there among the poor, all around your home, and on the plane ride home. At some point we all will be “Home.” It is our longing because it what we are to long for… And because Yeshua, with all of the answers, and all of the comfort of “knowing” awaits. In the meantime, He is taking account of all of your sorrows, and He keeps your tears in account.
Thanks Professor what all that you do in Yeshua’s Name.
Thanks to your family who is the magnet that draws you home. Thanks to your Ezer who makes the home beautiful for your return.
Shawn
When I meet fellow road-warriors on my travels, they all say the same thing. It’s not much fun anymore. Planes, taxis, hotels, conference rooms and more of the same. The only real satisfaction is in the eyes of those who attend my classes. When I see the lights go on, it’s worth it all.
Skip
I know what you feel; the joy of being used by the Lord and yet the sorow of not being with the ones you love while on the journey. May His joy fill you both now and when you arrive home.
Blessings,
John
My heart is arrested at reading your message. I for one am grateful for your sacrifice and I thank you for all you bear for the Name and cause of Yeshua. I and many like me benefit from your faithfulness. However, our growth and gratitude it is not a replacement for your ezer. Nothing can replace a man’s ezer or should. May Adonai fill the longing in your heart and renew your strength. They whose DNA is intertwined with Adonai will be restored; they will be enabled to arise and be mobile (Isaiah 40:31).
An unusual level of transparency here for you, Skip. The Lord knows the sacrifices you make for Him. It may be you need to spend more time at home while you are still here walking around.
I hurt for you Skip. I know some of the feeling you have & find myself there often. I will be praying for God’s wisdom for you as you juggle “abounding in the work of the Lord” & “abiding in Him”.
wow! You have made me look at my own life. to see how selfish I have been, taking my family for granted. Not enjoying them now. Waiting for everything to be perfect. I love the Lord and am thankful for you Skip. A man that bears his soul so that others may grow. I feel your pain yet there is so much strength there. You are a teacher that presses into the depts of hearts and forces otheres to press. Press toward our family, our God. Yes, I did enjoy the family on Sunday but it was yet just another day. We all went to our different churches to celebrate ressurection day but yes I know it should have been different. It was filled with errands, cooking, cleaning, rushing and laughing. But even with that after reading this today um it should have been more joy and less work. Thank you. I’m praying for you and I’m striving to be a better person because of you.