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“In other words, boldness is being able to say whatever needs to be said. It is to speak your heart and mind no matter what the consequences. …. Boldness is a function of godly trust, not self-confidence.”

This hits closer to home when I think of it in regard to marriage. It can be very painful when truth is spoken in love, especially when it ends the relationship because one spouse won’t receive what was spoken, or even stick around to try to understand what was meant. When both persons are grounded in trust, there is freedom to speak openly and honestly and reconcile their differences.

Micheal, I hope you’ve seen “The Bucket List.” Here is my favorite song from that movie, “Say,” by John Mayer:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSS0wtjrm1U

Speaking the truth sometimes is easy. But speaking the truth in love- (-Help!!). As we learn (through an often painful lifelong process) it is not only what we say, but how we say it. The “tone” of our voice will reflect the “tuning” of of our hearts.
“What’s down in the well will come up in the bucket.” Listen (differently) to the words of Yeshua: “You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.” “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” (Proverbs 12.18)
Solomon was a great man and a wise man but he was not Yeshua. Neither was Moses, David, or Rabbi Sha’ul. “Listen” to these words: The temple guards answered, “No human has ever spoken like this man.” (John 7.46) “When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching,” (Matthew 7:28) They were amazed at his teaching, because his message had authority. (Luke 4:32) We just finished a short study on “amazed.” When is the last time you heard anyone speak and you were “amazed?” I’m going to share a secret with you.
I am praying for (seeking and desiring) “lashon limudim,” the tongue of a disciple. (and do I ever have a long way to go!!)

I know this is long, but it is from our teacher, and worth our reading (since we each possess a tongue!). Our Bible has so much to say concerning our words and our speech but this particular piece written by brother Skip I hold in highest regard and count as my goal in life. May the Giver of all good gifts give unto us -the tongue of a disciple.

Adonai ELOHIM has given the ability to speak as a man well taught, so that I, with my words, know how to sustain the weary. (Isaiah 50:4)

The prophet says that God has given him lashon limudim (a disciple’s tongue), that knows how to sustain the weary. This is the gift of encouragement. It is the opposite of flattery, which uses words to entice and manipulate. The flatterer does not bother to discern the true character of the other person, but says whatever he must say to win the person over to his own designs. The gift of encouragement also differs from a mere pep talk that seeks to prop up the weary with positive generalizations. Instead, it sustains the person by observing his strengths, and affirming them in specific terms.
An old Yiddish saying tells us that “words should be weighed, not counted.” We will not sustain the weary through an abundance of words, but through words that are carefully chosen to identify with the weary; words that recognize his struggle and affirm the gifts that God has given him to succeed.

sorry for the double-post! -Skip-we will be praying for you.

Exactly Skip. Our ministry work for the past few decades has been in China working with the Chinese governmental officials and believers there. It’s one thing to share the gospel by the spoken word and another thing to live it out to its completeness to a nation / culture that has does not have Christian roots. Every day one must go to God for wisdom on how to handle each and every situation with truth and grace. Case in point. A “Christian” publishing firm was not responding in a timely fashion for payment they owed us on a project we had partnered on. Our Christian Chinese co-worker called and called them but no response (which in Chinese culture means, “no” but they just don’t want to tell you to save face.”) I told our co-worker, to be persistent in a kind way and to keep calling, to hold them accountable to contract. After a few months, still no answer and he said, “Christina, they’re not going pay and by not answering, that’s just the Chinese way.” I told him, “That may be the Chinese way but it’s not the Biblical way so we will have to kindly tell them we must terminate the contract and select another more ethical publishing house.” He felt really uncomfortable about it but I told him that if we just let things slide then Chinese culture would have superseded Kingdom culture principles and HOW we do God’s ministry is just if not more important than what we say at the pulpit. We must speak and live in God’s boldness even when it means great sacrifice on our part. This example was just a “small potato” in the whole scheme of things when it comes to living out God’s Kingdom principles in an atheistic or challenging environment but as God said, “If you are faithful in little, you will be faithful in much.” Speaking the truth in love is a difficult art and that’s why it takes the “fullness” of God’s Spirit for proper execution, timing, words…just like we saw Jesus do when He was here on earth. Strength and gentleness in perfect balance and combination.