Order And Purpose
And YHWH Elohim said, “It is not good the man being alone. I will make for him an ‘ezer kenegdo. Genesis 2:18
‘ezer kenegdo – The opening of the Bible is a declaration of God’s ordering the world. He is completely in control of all creation. His character is expressed in all that He does. His rule governs all He makes. Of course, this applies to human beings as well. What we notice is that God’s ordered design always entails purpose. There are no accidents in this universe. Everything has a role to play, a purpose built into its design. In fact, this interdependency is so apparent throughout creation that even atheists find it difficult to explain. Order, design and purpose are so pervasive that no explanation of the world that ignores this fact can be considered valid. Accident does not produce ordered complexity.
This structural fact of existence allows us to ask a fundamental question about the ‘ezer kenegdo. If God makes everything for a purpose, what is the purpose of the ‘ezer kenegdo? The text clearly tells us that God made (implying with intentional purpose) the Woman. She was perfectly designed to fulfill His purpose. So if we want to know what that purpose is, we need to look at this text from God’s point of view, not from the point of view of the beneficiary, Adam.
The text tells us that God was motivated to construct the ‘ezer kenegdo because of concern for the Man. But motivation is not purpose. Motivation explains why I make something, but that is not the same as what the creation does. God loved Adam. Adam was in need. His condition was not good in a universe designed around what is good. Therefore, something needed to be done. God produced the ‘ezer kenegdo in order to do something that would supply the need He observed.
In the past we explored in detail the connection between “good” and God’s first instruction for living. Very briefly, God recognizes that Adam cannot fulfill the instruction without someone who is specifically designed to act as the guide, boundary-keeper and supporter of the instruction. The serpent attacks the ‘ezer kenegdo precisely because she is the guide, the boundary-keeper and the spiritual director. She determines the direction the first couple takes. Adam acknowledges his agreement with this purpose in his excuse for his behavior to God. The crucial point is this: the ‘ezer kenegdo is designed with a purpose in mind. God made her that way. It is His ordering of the relationship between a husband and wife.
What does this mean today, after the collapse of Eden’s delight and thousands of years of unordered living? It means that if we are going to restore the world to the righteousness God intended, we will have to reorder the relationship of marriage. We will have to recognize and practice the purpose of the ‘ezer kenegdo. We will have to realize that she was designed as the guide, the protector, the provider of spiritual awareness, the one who sets the boundaries for God’s glory and our benefit. Whenever we refuse God’s order, chaos follows. That is abundantly clear here, where the basic relationship of life is on the line. If you as a woman are not fulfilling your purpose as ‘ezer kenegdo, something is drastically wrong. You know it. You feel it. Now you need to do something about it. You were meant to be so close to God that your man sees God’s hand in your life and knows that he is blessed in you. If you are a man, you need to let her be what she was meant to be, what she was designed to be and what you know she wants to be – for your benefit. Take off the shackles of control and follow your guide. Risk being blessed. What have you got to lose except your pride?
Topical Index: ‘ezer kenegdo, purpose, order, Genesis 2:18
I like most of what you write, Skip but I believe you are sorely mistaken on this recurring theme of yours – the relationship of woman to men. Your position appears to go beyond addressing the wrong attitude that treats women as inferior and second-rate and states that the woman is actually the man’s superior and Director.
You say that the woman is the “Spiritual Director” in the relationship. So Paul did not allow a woman to teach or have authority over men in the Kahal because the woman is the “Spiritual Director”? This makes no sense and you cannot say that the role of “Spiritual Director” relates only to marriage and not the Kahal because Paul precisely makes this connection – he takes the model of Adam and Chava and how they are created as a guide for what should take place in the direction and leadership of the Kahal.
The fact is that God in His infinite wisdom made men and women totally complementary yet very different functionally. Not just physically but spiritually and emotionally. This is not about superiority and inferiority. The attributes of women are not at all inferior to a man’s but complementary. But her qualities do not fit her for leadership, neither in the home or over the Kahal.
I believe my wife is not inferior in any way. Just as I am, she is created in the image and likeness of God, has equal value for Him and equal relationship with Him. She is fully engaged in the running of our home in every way (including financially) and I constantly seek to draw her view and input in every area because she is stronger in certain areas I am weak (particularly in relationships which are massively important to get right) and I totally depend upon her in many ways. My wife embraces this understanding as biblical and right and is happy and secure in it and our home is not chaos as you suggest will be the case – quite the contrary.
Hi Ken,
Thanks for your speedy reply. You are right. It is not about superiority or inferiority. But is is about guide and follower. We are the ones who make those terms into a rank hierarchy. The Hebrew text does not do that. A guide is a guide, not better or more important or superior to the follower. She is just a guide – doing what God intended her to do. As for Paul, your misreading of the text in 1 Timothy is common, but mistaken. Notice that Paul changes from a discussion of “women” (plural) to “woman” (singular) when he speaks about “a women should not teach.” There is a reason for this shift in number. Cunningham and others point out that Paul’s comment is directed to a specific woman who was teaching heresy (there is a lot of scholarly work available on this). I treat all this in my forthcoming book on the ezer kenegdo.
While I realize that my position seems controversial, I am not alone in this. Both Jewish and Christian scholars recognize that the Church has imported a subtle misogyny into the text. In fact, one of the things that I do in the book is trace the actual textual manipulations and translations behind this. In recent centuries the Church has attempted to back pedal a bit, changing, for example, the translation of teshuqah from “lust” to “desire,” but the Church has not faced the actually meanings of the Hebrew text nor the implications that Paul is a rabbinic scholar of Torah. I hope to have the book out by December, so if you don’t mind holding your breath – or asking your ezer kenegdo to be patient . . .
Skip, this is a great article!! Thanks!
Is the Cunningham to whom you refer, Loren Cunningham? Head of YWAM for many years?
Helen
Yes, but he isn’t the only one. Wait for the book and the bibliography.
http://www.amazon.com/Why-Not-Women-Biblical-Leadership/dp/1576581837
I’m waiting!! : )
Ken, if you think about it, this is the role that all women (believers or not) naturally assume. Skip may not thank me for pointing out his older post on this (when he has asked you to wait for the book release) but if you haven’t read it you may find it helpful.
https://skipmoen.com/2009/02/04/balancing-act/
By the way, you may find it interesting to hear that it wasn’t until 2nd Temple Pharasaical religious practice (Greek-influenced) that women were forbidden from having a “ministry role”… and that women were given “access all areas” in the 1st Temple and Tabernacle. Blessings to you and yours!
I don’t mind at all, but the book will have a lot more in it, and draw from a lot more resources. My job in the next 16 days at sea is to finish it.
Skip, which “Cunningham” are you referring to? And which publication?
http://www.amazon.com/Why-Not-Women-Biblical-Leadership/dp/1576581837
Thank you for this, Skip. It’s sort of like pushing the RESET button this morning, and I need to hear (and do)! 🙂
Skip, I was led by the Spirit to write my marriage handbook entitled, “LIFE IS SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED – Why Marriage Is All About CLEAVING.” Your understanding of the ‘wife’ fits perfectly into the message of that book which is based upon Genesis 2:24. Thank you. William A. Cummins
Let all things be done decently and in order. (1Corinthians 14:40)
Yes, brother Skip, this is our Sovereign G-d, the Creator and Micro-Manager of every blade of grass, and every hair on every head. Think (little man) of all the “parts and pieces” of G-d’s created order. (Selah)
Now that we have returned from our short “time-out,”- the question is asked:-“How big is G-d?” -I have the “audacity” to have an answer to this.. -G-d is…”bigger.” In other words this peanut mind of mine cannot begin to comprehend. In language I understand: G-d big, -me little.
This is His show. I am a just a passenger on Noah’s ark, and I am grateful to have been invited on- board. (Sure is noisy in here tho’)
G-d designed this planet and He knows how it should be managed. He has given unto us “all things that pertain unto life and godliness”, -if only we would pay attention and live according to His directions and instructions.
There is so much to say, concerning the “first couple.” I would like to point out, “both” were made in the image and likeness of Elohim. “Male and female, -“both.” -Have any of us given thought to the “femaleness” of G-d?
I have not set out to purposefully blaspheme His name, but just to “not forget,”- YHWH has declared and demonstrated to all, throughout His amazing creation, He is a “tender Warrior.”
More to say later if time permits..
This is awesome thank you, thank you The Lord through you spoke to my heart is time to stop talking the talk and start to walk the walk. Thank you once again.
How we (all) need to listen to the instuctions of Elohim. -Yes,we do. Eve did not (shema) and neither did
Adam. The choice and the consequence. “Both” were very present in the day of temptation. Was the fruit beautiful to look at? (Remember, Eve “saw” the fruit.) -I don’t care if it was an apple or a kumquat, that’s not the point. She “saw” the fruit.- Did (they) “remember” the word(s) of the LORD? -don’t eat the fruit..-(and even told them what would happen if they did), BUT,-did they (shema) the words of the LORD? What choice did they make (yes, the two of them), and what was the consequence?
Good. -“That was then, this is now,” we say. We are so much more “knowledgable” than the original pair. Why, -we are modern and sophisticated and learn-ed. We even have Google. Is there a need for the “Adam” of today to -shema- to the instructions of YHWH? – O, look, a butterfly.
Dear Skip,
This is in a way blowing my mind! But it is also something my wife came up with during the last 3 days. And now today we find your brandnew article. Look’s like a miracle!
Bessings,
Johan Tipker
The Netherlands
I am a woman. God showed this me last Thursday, after I’ve been praying how to go on in my marriage. It was such chaos! All along I felt my purpose, I knew my role. But I couldn’t get it to work, because of feelings of guilt, that I wouldn’t be in my role, if I guided my husband. He was supposed to be the head(read leader) but he just couldn’t. And he really wanted to! And I knew I had all the capabilities. He knew it too. It seemed so unfair. But I knew, if God says something to be, it must be good for us. So I kept on letting my husband lead, while all the time he told me that he really tried, but it just didn’t work. I didn’t believe hem. God doesn’t give a man a role he can’t fullfill. I couldn’t respect him anymore for the result of his leadership: chaos in our lives. At that point I was explaining to someone how God sees our roles in marriage. This was in an email last Monday. But I felt strongly I couldn’t send it, so I saved it. Until Thursday…
Someone told me that “head” meant origin. My husband is my origin. It was the only thing I needed to hear. From that moment on I respected my husband just because he is my origin, like Christ is his origin. It turned around my attitude. All pieces came to place. Everything you say above came the next day, Friday, to my mind, I saw what had happend the last years and I finally understood. But I still couldn’t believe, I asked God to confirm it all, and just today, that happend again when I read on http://www.godswoordcentraal.nl from the Netherlands a translation of your writing. I was directed to your site.
I told my husband, and he agreed. He knew it all along too.
God bless you Skip, I can now practice my role without guilt. I’ll spread the Word!