God of Sorrow
When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints. Selah. Psalm 77:3 ESV
Moan – What do you feel when you remember God? Does a radiant joy spread across your face? Or are you one with Asaph, discovering that remembering the Lord causes you great pain? Were you taught that God likes only positive feelings? Are you hiding your groans for fear that they are not really acceptable in the court of the King? Maybe Asaph has something very important to teach us in his vulnerable transparency.
The Hebrew text reads v-‘ehemaya’. It might be translated, “I make noise,” or “I mourn,” or “I roar,” but no matter what verb you choose to use, the idea is all about penetrating disturbance and deep turmoil. I can imagine that this verb expresses something like the feelings Yeshua had when he viewed resistant Jerusalem. It must be a mixture of weeping and outrage, grief and indignation. The verb captures those moments when our prayers are shouts and tears at the same time.
Is that how you remember God? Of course, the verb translated remember is zakar. It too has a wide range of meanings, so perhaps we can lessen the dissonance by translating it as “profess” or even “praise.” But linguistic alterations won’t heal the emotional onslaught, will they? There really are times when remembering God causes intense emotional anguish. In fact, if you haven’t had a few moments like this, I wonder if you have ever truly been in His presence. Even the Son knew moaning. The sounds in the Garden were filled with anguish on that particular night.
In the end Asaph’s agony helps me. I discover that the deep distress of my heart doesn’t mean I am a stranger in God’s house. I find that I am not rejected because I can’t reach a state of sacred bliss today. I am a brash but broken cymbal, a noisy disturbance in the harmony of the universe. I cannot be quiet. The sorrow of my soul will not be quenched with theological platitudes. I remember God—and I groan.
Perhaps we are too quick to think of God as the calm, benevolent, untroubled Ruler of the universe. The prophets certainly paint a picture of God that is anything but passive and composed. Perhaps remembering God must include a strong dose of sorrow, a shot of agony, a cup of ferocity. Of course we are to remember His great deeds of mercy, but is that all? Are we not also to remember His broken heart, His plea to return, His sorrow over our waywardness? Are we not also to stagger from the memory of the golden calf, the marriage of Hosea, the despair of Babylon?
When you remember your God, have you limited yourself to only those thoughts that bring you joy or do you know the full counsel of the Lord?
Topical Index: remember, zakar, moan, hama, Psalm 77:3
This one was for me!! God knew what I needed this day, and He has given it to me through this beautiful message. I am blessed beyond words to express.
Thank you, Skip!
It was for me too. I have started out having one of those days and thought It was just me. Thank you for writing this today. Have a blessed day everyone.
Paul gives us the wonderful eternal perspective which
moves us just past “now”.
“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time
are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall
be revealed in us.” Rm 8:18
TW reminds me that God is really good and allows me to hurting in his presence. With him I can let it all hang out. Not always that way with my human friends. However, my dogs still love me and God does too.
Skip, is anger a valid emotion to express towards God? I believe it is, along with the other negative emotions you mentioned. I don’t hear that taught or modeled in the Church today. Instead we are made to feel guilty for even having that emotion, not to mention for actually expressing it!
Every emotion is a vehicle that can draw us to God. The issue is not the feeling but the direction we take it.
“Every emotion is a vehicle that can draw us to God. The issue is not the feeling but the direction we take it.”
Thank you for this! Thank you for ending the sentence. In the flesh, I see people want to camp out on the emotion place and think they have arrived at the top of the ‘spiritual’ mountain. And you can’t even talk to them about going any further. They have arrived. No. They have begun. In fact, most of what people like to call “spiritual practices” look more to me like just ways to get emotionally drunk. Sorry. Can we please talk about that direction next? What should we do next? If emoting – then what? If emotion is inhale, what is this exhale direction stuff? An emotion is a flesh reaction. All well and good, but what catapults us from there into the spiritual? If there is the line, then how do we cross it?
I don’t think we’re talking about the kind of emotion that leaves some people as blubbering messes during “praise and worship” or when requesting prayer from the congregation. That kind of emoting often seems to me to be self-serving, even though I realize it may also be unintentional and sincere.
I think this is the anguish of heart that comes with great pain and loss. This cry is not a release of our soulfulness, but the breathing out from the depth of agony that comes with brokenness. It’s not something that typically would occur in public but in the wee hours of the morning when we can’t sleep for the pain that twists and tears at our hearts and minds. It’s when the moan is too deep for words, when the tears flow down you face without sound and only gasps escape us as the reflection of the agony of our souls.
There is no gap here between the soul and the spirit. It’s not a mountaintop to be attained but a wilderness to be endured. And the only means of surviving it is the knowing that God is still there in the midst of it with me, even though I may not “feel” Him at the moment.
That was totally elegant, Suzanne, and really spot on for me. A dear friend of mine has been slogging through a very deep valley recently. And he met God there. For the first time, And the experience went to the deep visceral bottom, simply because that was where he happened to be. I think when He shows up in the places we need Him most, we get much more of Him than on those mountaintops that we seek in the flesh. Those high places of ‘spiritual attainment’. Up there, there is way too much room for our definitions of Him, and way too much room for us. Down in the valley, where there is no more room at the inn for us, there is finally enough room for Him.
The Rest of the Story
~ You led Your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron ~
(Psalm 77.20)
I confess! – I cheated! I have read “the rest of the story!..” Yes, David was troubled.. Yes, David was distressed.. Yes, David had “issues..” BUT!.
I have become a huge “fan” of Bible buts!! I love Bible buts!! Here is (only) one for us, “But God..” ~ But God, who is rich in mercy.. ~
David? Are you still listening? May I? May I repeat and repeat and repent and remember? ~ But God.. ~ But God who is rich in mercy.. ~
Friend, I suggest we “know” this. “Mercy there was great- and grace was free!” – Where is “there?” (I’m so glad u asked!)- At Calvary. Have u ever “been there?” Come with me to the tslav, the execution stake, the cross! – And let us (together) kneel before the One who is there.. bleeding and pleading for us- “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do..” No. – We certainly do not. For had we known it, – we would not have crucified the LORD of glory.
And did you know? – the preaching, the proclamation, the message, the word of the cross is “foolishness?” to them who are perishing? How “foolish” it seems to some.. Yes, why would God.. How could God.. SO love the world? Oh… the LOVE that drew salvation’s plan! (God is the Architect) Oh, the grace (yes, “grace” – an entirely “new” concept, -for the Law came by Moses, but (both) grace and Truth came (to us) by One, – Jesus, (who is the) Messiah.
I was just a child, when I felt the Savior leading
I was drawn to what I could not understand,
And for the cause of Christ, I have spent my days believing
That what He’d have me be, -is who I am.
As I’ve come to see the weaker side of me
I realize His grace is what I’ll need
When sin demanded justice for my soul,
Mercy said no.
I’m not gonna let you go
I’m not gonna let you slip away..
You don’t have to be afraid
Mercy said “no.”
Sin will never ever take control.
Life and death stood face to face
Darkness tried to steal my heart away carry..
Thank You Jesus, Mercy said No!!
For God so loved the world, that He sent His son to save us
From the cross He built a bridge to set us free
Oh, but deep within our hearts, there is still a war that rages
And makes a Sacrifice so hard to see
As midnight fell on crucifixion day,
The light of hope seemed oh so far away
As evil tried to stop redemption’s flow..
And now when Heaven looks at me
It’s through the blood of Jesus..
Reminding me of one day long ago..
Mercy said, “NO!”
(Therefore..Hallelujah!) I will sing of the mercies of the LORD – forever!!
Carl! Another beautiful “story”…….Thank you!!
Helen
My grandmother passed away the day this was posted, I was blessed to be at her bedside when she passed and to serve her in the weeks before her passing. I would trade nothing for those last moments with her and yes I groan when I think of God. A loving yet just God.