Two Steps Forward
So Naomi returned, and with her Ruth the Moabitess, her daughter-in-law, who returned from the land of Moab. Ruth 1:22 NASB
Returned – How are you going? No, it’s not a typo. It’s not “where are you going?” that matters at this moment. It’s “how.” The verbs used to describe Naomi’s return are quite interesting. Zeigler notes that “each time Naomi took at step to embark on her journey she withdrew back to the city, only to gather her strength again in another bid to depart. One could paraphrase the verbs in the story in the following manner: ‘She got up [but then sat down again]. And she returned from the fields of Moab [but then she went back]. And she departed from the place [only to return to it]. And she went on the road . . . .’”[1] Two steps forward, one step back. That’s how she was going. It seems that we are children of Naomi—two forward, one back.
“Where are you going?” The central question asked by the Angel in the encounter with Hagar. Of course, Hagar can’t answer. She is going to her death, a place she doesn’t know. Do you know where you’re going? To your destiny? To that place where you can be who you really are? And what got in the way? Life. The choices you made that made you make other choices until at last you were not what you thought you would be. You arrived at a place you did not know. “Where are you going?”
“Ah, I really don’t know anymore. I thought I was going there, but now I don’t see how to get there.”
“How are you going?”
“Well, I go forward and then I go back. I achieve. I fail. I overcome. I collapse. I’m up. I’m down.”
Perhaps you need the hesed of someone you didn’t count on to drag you to the place where you can remember God? Perhaps you really are worn out, unable to go forward without going back. Perhaps God will send someone who is not like you in order to push you down the road you should have traveled years ago.
I didn’t say, “Go willingly.” I didn’t say, “Without regret.” But we all know that life in-between forward and backward isn’t life. It’s death. Slow, prolonged, dysentery death. The kind that empties you of vitality. The kind that starves you from the inside. The “in-between” vacillation of real hell.
What brings about this back and forth living? Fear, guilt, embarrassment, pain. Perhaps you and I need to talk more about those things in order to stop stepping backwards.
Topical Index: returned, hesed, forward, back, Ruth 1:22
[1] Yael Ziegler, Ruth, p 134.
Yes. We do.
Sometimes in decision making we procrastinate a lot, that is because we are leaning toward our own understanding,.and not asking our heavenly Father for guidance he said, ask and it shall be given, seek and he shall find, knock and it will be open unto you, therefore in all our decision making on this narrow path, we have to ask for his help every step we take.
This reads a lot like the concern James answered James 1.
Our uncertainties result in us going nowhere slowly instead living now here…
Blessed are the poor in spirit.
Skip how will we know whose hesed will bring us closer to the next level of freedom…
Good point.
Yes, two steps forward, one step back. Progress not perfection. Glad to be moving forward because there was a time in my life when I was going back or going nowhere. Stuck and miserable. My rock of salvation is YHVH. A mighty fortress is our God!
Maybe the word is procrastination. Yes, a conversation would be good about how to move forward in the midst of fear, guilt and indecision.
” Perhaps God will send someone who is not like you in order to push you down the road you should have traveled years ago.” May YHVH provide us with this person or persons to help us. God Bless.
Karen may God bless you to be such a person.