Mary Mallon
Because of all my adversaries, I have become a reproach, especially to my neighbors, and an object of dread to my acquaintances; those who see me in the street flee from me. Psalm 31:11 NASB
Reproach– Are you the Mary Mallon of sin? Remember her? She was “the first person in the United States identified as an asymptomatic carrier of the pathogen associated with typhoid fever. She was presumed to have infected 51 people, three of whom died, over the course of her career as a cook.”[1] She earned the nickname, Typhoid Mary. I suspect that those of us whose disastrous choices have become the objects of the public eye may feel a bit like Typhoid Mary. Just ask a recovering alcoholic or drug addict (no, maybe you’d better not ask), or someone with a less acceptable sinful past. The Typhoid Mary syndrome used to be associated with the divorcee in the church. Shunned. The object of gossip (“You know, there’s always another side of the story. After all, it takes two to tango”). Maybe you have been ostracized like Mary Mallon for some other socially unacceptable infraction. Of course, what one person can do, any other person can do, but in religious circles the wounded are routinely excluded from God’s hospital. Paul’s exhortation to share one another’s burdens seems to be applied only to communal tithes and Facebook revelations.
David suggests something else. He uses the word ḥerpâ, a Hebrew term that “imputes blame or guilt to someone in order to harm his character.”[2] It implies scorn, insults and taunts. There is nothing redeeming about someone characterized by this word. But notice why David feels the impact of ḥerpâ. “Because of all my adversaries,” he writes. He doesn’t say, “because of all my sins.” That’s what we might expect these days. Scorned, insulted, excluded—because we haven’t lived up to religious expectations. Our sins condemn us. But this is not David’s perspective here in this psalm. He is pāḥad, “a strong verb of fearing with emphasis either on the immediacy of the object of fear or upon the resulting trembling.”[3] In other words, even his neighbors, who used to be friendly, run from him. Why?
Once again, the answer is found in the ancient art of divine drama. David echoes Job. Those who observe his circumstances draw the conclusion that God must have abandoned him. After all, if God were really on his side, he would not be surrounded by prevailing enemies. He would not be distressed, discouraged, and despairing. If God were really pleased with David, these things would not happen. Therefore, because they are happening, God must be displeased with David, and if God is displeased with David, then you and I want nothing to do with him. He is a carrier of God’s displeasure and it might be infectious. Stay away.
We know that David is not at fault. We know that he has admitted any possible wrong-doing. We know that he loves and serves God. But the surrounding society sees only the external conditions. They fall prey to the effect and cause fallacy, the same fallacy that the disciples expressed to Yeshua when they encountered the man born blind. That fallacy assumes that some present disastrous condition must be the result of a prior sin. In other words, while it is true that sin often produces observable harmful consequences, it is not true that the presence of harmful circumstances necessarily implies the presence of sin. But we often assume it does. And we shun those who appear to be outside the will of God. We run from the supposed infection, unlike our Savior who visited the desperately sick. We make Mary Mallons out of people who are wrestling with God.
What a shame!
Topical Index: Mary Mallon, ḥerpâ, scorn, blame, pāḥad, dread, fallacy, Psalm 31:11
[1]https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Mallon
[2]Mccomiskey, T. E. (1999). 749 חָרַף. In R. L. Harris, G. L. Archer, Jr. & B. K. Waltke (Eds.), Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament(325). Chicago: Moody Press.
[3]Bowling, A. (1999). 1756 פָּחַד. In R. L. Harris, G. L. Archer, Jr. & B. K. Waltke (Eds.), Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament(720).
Skip, where were you in my “days of reproach”? Thank you! This TW is why I love you. You have been given a beautiful task. Thank you for speaking the unspeakable so many times.
Y’all, this is personal and LONG, so don’t read it unless you want to.
I had long years in those days to observe how things were. Initially, I wanted it all to be a bad dream: “I am not actually Typhoid Mary; you have made a mistake”. I was in denial. I repented eventually for that denial, as it changed nothing. So I pulled my head out of the (very painful) sand and had a look around.
Then I went through a period where I tried to be in agreement: “you must be right; I am awful, even though no matter how I parse it, I cannot see what I need to atone for. Therefore I will suffer all the atonement prescribed, no matter how awful, in hopes of redemption”. Y’all, in all my life, I have yet to see anybody suffering from the censure and condemnation of others that managed to suffer ‘enough’ to ‘earn’ redemption. Of all the persons right now suffering the condemnation of another in hopes of some day being ‘worthy’ of their love again, I want to say that humans lack the ability to dish out shame or reward adequately. That is a harsh statement, because a lot of us are parents in particular, where it seems sometimes that is the very definition of the job, or are currently in other situations of representative authority, or, perhaps even just find ourselves in a mere gossip ring. The worst of all can be a community of genuine function and goodwill who inadvertently find themselves identifying with the majority on some matter – any matter – against the minority who are not in that cliche. Immediately, temptation rears its ugly head: “we must ‘get’ them before they, before they – they – well, EXPOSE us!” And the witch hunt is on. In the name of ‘righteousness’, of course. I never reached atonement. I eventually saw there was none to reach. Revelation.
I tried ‘hating’ others as much as they were practicing it on me, but I quickly gave that up because I could quickly see there was no winning that one: the other side had the superiority of not only numbers, but a hidden source of energy – motivation – for that hatred that I lacked access to. I merely wanted to survive (by this time I guess I had started to give up wanting to be liked or even respected and let alone). So I chose rebellion as the means of energy to keep me alive. I could at least find the will to get up in the morning because I now had at least one person on ‘my’ side: me! It felt better, but the price in adrenaline was very high, and I became schitzo, to boot. The fear skyrocketed. (Well, that IS what adrenaline does!) I knew rebellion was wrong somehow, but I was desperate.
To the extent that I agreed with the rejection of others was the extent that I rejected myself. I became suicidal: not because I necessarily agreed with it, but because I found myself staring it in the face. The next time you find yourself, on any societal or personal level, pitted against another in any way, please understand that, on some level, they are going to be picking up on that and it is going to feel like death to them. I would like to ask if any of us have the dubious ‘right’ to sentence anybody to the death of rejection? If so, please at least consider the possibility that we have to be rejecting ourselves (or suffering already from rejection of some sort) to even be able to reject another. Before you pick up that stone, know that your own rejection reflection is already present in the cosmic mirror of reality. As images, I think we can only do what has been done to us. (Even the Golden Rule is only possible because God loved us first.)
To find forgiveness, I had to identify with my persecutors: I had to put myself in their shoes. It was awful! I could see then why they were in such pain that they felt they had to hurt me. But when I finally decided to identify with their pain – understand the situation from their point of view – I found the key out of my own. O blessed perspective!
To suffer reproach is the end of innocence, because somehow, somewhere, reproach demands that something unspeakable must be faced: some fracture must be found and repairs must be initiated. I think society wanted Typhoid Mary to ‘fix’ what they could not. But none of us can fix the messes that we are (yep, that’s right, Pam: I am talking to you!). We all deserve reproach, but none of us can atone for it; not even the reproachers – especially them. They are as stuck, on their side of the fracture, as their victim. When it comes to redemption – the repairing of the breach that reproach is the diagnosis of – all sides of the problem need to turn to the One Who has willingly taken on all of our reproaches. He staggered and fell under my blows just as surely as if I had condemned Him or driven the nails. And that reproach is the worst of all, because it is mine unless and until I put it on Him. But because the alternative is worse, I accept the invitation to do so. And I weep again. Thank you, my Saviour.
Good morning Miss Laurita, who knew being such a mess could be so loving and enduring. Thanks from miss messy!!!
Thank you for sharing this, Laurita! It can only help us to understand that there is another “fork in the road,” if we want to take it. 🙂 Truly, if no one explains grace in a manner such as you have, we may miss the very valuable opportunities to share it with others who need it as desperately as we do.
Yeshua wants us to know what He knows: The reality of
the Father and the miracle of His redemptive love and power.
Even our dearest and most cherished friends may be deceived
about the true status of our knowing Him. And how easily they
can draw false conclusions.
That’s OK. It shouldn’t put a crimp in our style. “I know who I have
believed”, Paul told us. We do, too. It’s hard to explain water to a fish…
or light to a person who lives in darkness.
But God’s power has a language of its own. Who escapes hearing it?
Sadly to say, it’s true. Very cult like. And no doubt it has to do with something that is based on a lie. And then there are those pat answers or the religious type responses that can drive you crazy.