COVID Catastrophes
“We’ll just connect on Skype.”
“We can do a ZOOM conference.”
“All the classes are on-line now.”
Oh, did you think that the issues fostered by the COVID-19 virus were limited to medical and economic? Did you believe that human isolation as a preventative measure was really a good thing? That it “saved” innumerable lives? (I often wonder if those statistics are like the message on your sales receipt that says, “You saved 30%” after you spent $90.) Perhaps it was necessary to avoid large public gatherings despite studies of herd immunization. Perhaps the economy of most of the world’s population can somehow survive long enough to experience government mandated restrictions in the name of health safety. Perhaps. But one thing is absolutely certain. Human connection is in serious trouble.
It might not be true that most human communication is non-verbal, but if any part of the way we interact with each other can be attributed to face to face presence, then it is certainly true that reactions to COVID have had a detrimental effect on who we are as human beings. As Brené Brown has noted: “Technology . . . has become a kind of imposter for connection, . .”[1] We don’t really connect via technology. We only connect in all the ways that matter when we are present to each other—that is, fully present, in body, mind and spirit. What COVID has done to humanity can’t be assessed in terms of physical and economic consequences alone. The reaction to COVID has engendered a mental disorder. Human beings are hard wired for connection, and for the first time in the modern world, we are being forced to sever those connections, to become less than human.
Of course, no one is talking about COVID as a mental disorder. In fact, COVID responses are actually supported by an underlying cultural myth—the myth of self-sufficiency.
“One of the greatest barriers to connection is the cultural importance we place on ‘going it alone.’ Somehow we’ve come to equate success with not needing anyone. Many of us are willing to extend a helping hand, but we’re very reluctant to reach out for help when we need it ourselves.”[2]
If Brown’s assessment was true when she wrote it a decade ago, it is logarithmically expanded in a world where you are told to be afraid of being with other people. Self-sufficiency has become more than an objective. It is now a necessity. COVID fear is the accepted rational for a helping hand at “social distancing” lengths. Please don’t come to visit me in person. That’s much too close. We might die!
Brown’s work on connection is critically important if we are going to understand the true danger of COVID responses.
“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”[3]
The problem isn’t the need for connection. That’s a given. The problem is that connection requires a degree of intimacy, an experience of presence; something COVID prohibits.
I’m not a prognosticator. In fact, as you know, I believe that prediction is something you recognize as true after it has occurred. But I am inclined to say this: the critical fallout from COVID restrictions will not be seen in physical and economic changes. It will be seen in the deterioration of relationships, of connection, and of general mental health. If humanity is forced to adopt a new “normal” where physical presence is no longer acceptable, humanity will suffer an identity crisis that may not be recoverable.
[1] Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection, p. 20.
[2] Ibid.
[3] Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection, p. 19
