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I am full of shame, and conscious of my misery.  Job 10:15b  NASB

Shame – You might think that the Hebrew word here is the common word translated “shame,” i.e., bôš.  That word is found in verses like Psalm 25:2 (“Let me not be ashamed”).  Its primary meaning is public humiliation.

“to fall into disgrace, normally through failure, either of self or of an object of trust.” Along with its derivatives, it occurs 155 times, all but 25 times in the prophets or the Psalms. No less than 38 occurrences are found in Jeremiah and 20 in Isaiah. The word is often paralleled with kālam “to be humiliated,” and less frequently with ḥātat “to be shattered, dismayed.” As these parallels suggest, the force of bôš is somewhat in contrast to the primary meaning of the English “to be ashamed,” in that the English stresses the inner attitude, the state of mind, while the Hebrew means “to come to shame” and stresses the sense of public disgrace, a physical state.^[1]

When we read this verse in Job, we probably imagine that he is experiencing inner chagrin or humiliation.  That’s how we would use the term.  But as you can see, even bô isn’t about some inner emotional state.  But Job doesn’t use this common term.  Instead, he uses the noun qālôn, from the verb that means “the lowering of another’s social position. . . It denotes a state wherein its referent is as if he were in a lower social position than he in fact occupies.”^[2]  Job isn’t suffering from inner emotional distress.  He’s saying that his typical status among his peers has been reduced.  He’s lost face.  What’s interesting about his claim is highlighted in Coppes’ remark, “Knowledge of one’s true stance before God is required of all who are to seek God.”^[3]  Job’s claim that he is innocent of wrongdoing now confronts his present circumstances as a challenge to his self-awareness.  But Job acknowledges his loss of face.  He is deeply aware of his “misery,” actually, “affliction” (ʿŏnî).  There is simply no denying the apparent consequences.  Importantly, this “affliction” follows that nuance of the Hebrew, that is, it is forced upon him.  He is thrust into a lowly position just as one would do to an enemy, and it is this nuance that  causes his friends to assume that he has sinned.  In fact, the word is used to describe what God does to His enemies.

Shame and misery don’t quite describe what we would feel in the Hebrew text.  This combination from Job’s speech tells us that Job now feels as if he and God are enemies.  He experiences that kind of treatment that God enacts upon those who oppose Him.  Is it any wonder that he is distraught and confused?  Everything tells him that he has lost favor.  He just doesn’t know why.  Perhaps you and I have felt the same distance.  Perhaps we pushed it aside thinking that God was just silent for a reason.  But somewhere we wonder, “What did I do?”

Topical Index: shame, ashamed, bôš, qālôn, misery, affliction, ʿŏnî, Job 10:15b

^[1] Oswalt, J. N. (1999). 222 בּוֹשׁ. In R. L. Harris, G. L. Archer Jr., & B. K. Waltke (Eds.), Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament (electronic ed., p. 97). Moody Press.

^[2] Coppes, L. J. (1999). 2024 קָלָה. In R. L. Harris, G. L. Archer Jr., & B. K. Waltke (Eds.), Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament(electronic ed., p. 799). Moody Press.

^[3] Ibid.