Experience Matters
Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the lord your God is giving you. Exodus 20:12 ESV
by Michael Moen
Honor – The word kabbed is found 376 times in the Hebrew Bible. It is used over half the time as a reference to a “weighty” person in society, someone who is honorable, impressive, worthy of respect. Today is my birthday and now I am turning 24 years old. My father asked if I would write a Today’s Word edition and I chose to speak about an issue I believe to be very important. I look to this verse and wonder why my age group has turned their gaze away from honoring their parents and elders. For whatever reason I originally grew up with the utmost respect for my elders, especially my grandfather, but as I grew into my teens it seemed that my age group and society in general whether it be social media or my educational environment, promoted the belief that I was capable of figuring out my life and path on my own. After all, I knew what trends were more popular then my parents; I knew how to use a computer and a cell phone better then most adults; so it seemed reasonable that what the world was feeding me was right, that I didn’t need the guidance of those who walked before me because it seemed I was capable of figuring it all out without them. However, what I came to discover was the more I ignored the counsel of those who walked before me, the more I became lost in my faith.
Today society promotes what is new. Even before the iPhone 5 came out people were already beginning to discuss what the iPhone 6 was going to offer. What was popular was always what was new, technology and everything else. Many ministries I look at and churches I have been involved in adamantly promote young adults to go off and represent what the ministry and church is about, because youth appears to be more attractive. What I have realized as a young adult is that when the whole world is telling those my age how wonderful it is to be young and how I need to do all I can right now while I have the opportunities, I slowly begin to neglect or disregard what those with years of experience have to offer me. I no longer need their advice. After all, most of the advice I get is not in the best interest of me becoming popular because most of it explains what I am doing wrong, and I don’t believe I am wrong. I believe that what I know is more accurate than what my elders tell me because I grew up in a different world than my elders did. They just don’t understand how things have changed. I look back at this and thank God that He showed me the error of my ways. Millard Erickson writes, “In our day, especially in western cultures old persons are sometimes looked down upon. In part this is due to the cult of youth; youth is exalted as the fullest expression of humanity.”[1] Erickson explains that the Hebrews held great honor for those of old age. I now know why this was the case. My Grandfather, my parents, and my mentors all have lived out their lives in relationship with God and have deepened their relationship with Him in ways that only experience can obtain. Just like marriage or friendship, the longer you maintain it the deeper it becomes.
I now look to my elders again with an open mind knowing that what they have to tell me will help me as I experience the same struggles they faced, even despite the fact that they may have experience these things under different circumstances. I hope and pray that my life will help others my age look towards their elders with respect and open minds. I hope and pray that your children learn this valuable lesson that will help serve them in their lives as they grow into the men and woman of God that He is calling them to be. I pray that my age group begins to realize that youth can be fruitful in many things but there is so much more for us to learn before we really have the capability to be effective in God’s plan for us. I hope that all of those who read this know that I wish to learn from you and what you have to say, so I might strengthen my relationship with God and prepare myself to endure the hardships that a life of faith involves. I thank all of those who have gone out of their way to give me advice and counsel. I hope that the young men and woman that all of you influence learn the value of what you have to offer them!
Topical Index: honor, elders, parents, Exodus 20:12i kabbed
“the longer you maintain it the deeper it becomes.” Well said Michael.
toda raba,
Chris
Happy birthday, Michael! Have a blessed day and keep to the narrow way.
The email version said this was by Skip. Now Skip looks young, but I knew he wasn’t 24, so I checked here to see if there might be a correction. Very good word, Michael. 24 is a great year.
The system automatically generates my name, but MICHAEL, my son, wrote it.
I get this. And just because I am getting older doesn’t change that fact. I still defer to my father in his 80’s because he is wise. I have found myself in a place I thought I wouldn’t be, divorced after many long years. The person in my life started talking seriously and I said ‘that is nice but you will have to discuss all of this with my father.’ He was surprised. But, I have found that my father who is very close to me and raised me knows me! He is outside the situation but still close enough to wisely and lovingly give me the very best opinion for me to ponder; as well as speak directly to this man on my behalf with great wisdom and knowledge. I don’t think we realize how important parents are even in the process of future relationships. I didn’t do so well the last time, this time I’m seeking my parents counsel and I really don’t care how old I am…..Dad is old yet!
For all of us, people come and go but usually your parents and elders around you stick! If you don’t have them you can look around and find some! These are the people that give me stability. I find as I get older I seek them out more. It’s like treasure hunting before the treasures are lost. I only wish I had more time with my mother before her passing away. I took her for granted as youth. She was always there, devoted but it seemed annoying. But, I was young and ignorant. I loved her of course but I had not idea her precious value. I have not made that mistake with my dad who God has allowed to remain all these years and still impart his wisdom and love to everyone he meets. We fight over him!
And now, for the response from the generation preceding yours.. “mine”- (talkin’ ’bout my generation..) ~ that you may tell it to generations following.. (Psalm 48.13) “Teach your children well..” (Joel 1.3)
Michael, (and to my own son) it is hard to imagine (possibly) that your father was once 24 years young and should you both live long enough, once day (ackk!- “skeeery”) you too will have gray hairs (if hairs a’toll) and krinkles on your face and brow. You both should know, inside of every 70 year old man is a 35 year old asking, -“what happened?” lol!
Yes, we know (and remember well) what it was like to be in our twenties. – Why, – it was only “yesterday!” lol!
So what is the difference between our generations? We golden oldies have witnessed a few more sunrises and sunsets. We have been over a few more mountains and through a few more valleys than the both of you and we are quite familiar with the roads you are both travelling. In short: “been there- done that”- and now wear the T-shirt, “Exhibit A”.
Our faces tell the story. I can only speak for my son, but hopefully Michael, your father’s face is a happy one, reflecting his journey with Jesus and time spent with Him.
We fathers, have discovered something. Something that is both delightful and exceedingly comforting. It is this: The Word(s) of God are true and faithful. God says what He means and He means what He says. Unlike us, “God don’t play.” The Word of God is “kabbad”. How “heavy?” ~ Like a hammer that breaks the rock in pieces! ~ (Jeremiah 23.29)
~ Great peace belongs to those who love Your instruction, and nothing makes them stumble ~ (Psalm 119.165)
Now I ask both sons, both young men, the son belonging to Skip and the son belonging to Carl,- do you love the instruction of YHWH? Do you (today) love the word(s) of God?
And interestingly enough, the word of God is “both” written and living!
Young men, ask your father if there is any doubt “Who” this is referring to: ~ He is dressed in a robe dipped in blood, and His Name is the Word of God ~ (Revelation 19.13)
I remember well (back in the day) the counsel of this father to his son:
” Sin will keep you from tHis Book, or tHis Book will keep you from sin.”
But the choice of which path to follow belongs to both of you.
And remember, when both of you pray, say ~ Our Father Who is in Heaven ~ , “kabbad” (hagios) is Your Name! How holy is He?
Michael, you could not have said better words with better timimg. Thank you for your frankness and for having this message to share in the first place. With loving appreciation, Graham.
Michael,
Your wisdom is not of this world, or the culture that begs to engulf you. And, without a doubt, is being fed by your study of the Word of the LORD and from a loving and wise earthly father, as well. May YHWH continue to heap blessings upon you!
Please forgive me for writing here, as I wanted to reply to March 16,2013, “CULTURAL RELEVANCE” THAT INCLUDED SOMETHING ON HENRI J.M. NOUWEN’S BOOKS. I could not find it in my lap top. I have been as busy with my critically ill husband for several months now, as I was every in the prime of my life. I have written a few times about what tragic things my husband has gone through : in three months he has had 5 different hospital stays from 12 days as longest, and three days shortest. A $37,000 helicopter life flight ride, to me driving him twice an hour drive to from the local ER room hospital here to a larger one. All with different traumas; we could not recover from one shock until there was a totally different one!- My husband is 84, I am 80. & married 60 years & 8 months. i HAVE HAD TWO OF NOUWEN’S BOOKS IN MY PERSONAL LIBRARY FOR TEN YEARS:my favroite has always been “RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL SON”. NOUWEN WAS BORN IN Holland in 1932,became a Catholic monk, lived in many countries, but was in Holland when he died of heart trouble in 1964, at age 64 years. He was on his way to his second trip to Russia to visit Rembrandt’s masterpiece- the Prodigal Son, in Saint Petersburg
But now, my favorite book of his, “AGING THE FULLFILLMENT OF LIFE” . Just a teeny tiny glen of it: ” without the presence of old people we might forget that we are aging. The elderly are our prophets, they remind us that what we see so clearly in them is a process in which we all share.–There lives are full of warnings but also of hopes.–” Every thought of his, I soak up and then compare to God’s Word, and ask God to help me evaluate it for our lives today. May we never stop learning, seeking the Lord in all of His great wisdom, and may we never forget each day, that this could be our last one on earth. Sincerely, LaVaye Billings– thanks for the opportunity to write this!
Congrats on 24.
Why children are looking to their peers rather than parents:
“Hold on to your kids – why parents need to matter more than peers” Gordon Neufeld and Gabor matè
Hi Michael,
Very nicely stated, and you are fortunate to have such a wise and knowledgeable father 🙂
Happy Birthday and best wishes!