Hardly Possible
Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity. Ephesians 4:26-27 NASB
Be angry – I get angry. Just ask my wife. I can lash out, criticize, debunk and disparage with the best. Paul certainly doesn’t have to instruct me about getting angry. It’s the second part of his exhortation that’s the problem. In Jewish ethics, it’s learning how to control the lashon ha’ra.
Paul actually quotes Psalm 4:4. “Be angry and do not sin; ponder in your own hearts on your beds, and be silent.” Better not to speak than to speak with intent to harm. My mother used to tell me something like that. But the Hebrew isn’t quite the same as our idea of anger. The verb is ragaz. Yes, it can mean “to rage,” but it also means “to tremble, to quake.” So it is associated not only with anger but also with fear. Maybe what I need is the recognition that fear and anger are related. The Greek verb, orgizo, sends me in the direction of wrath, the volcanic release of uncontrolled emotional damage. In Greek I think about revenge, vengeance, reprisal, defense and power. But anger is a lot more subtle. Hebrew teaches me that anger is connected to fear. If I went to a therapist, she would probably tell me the same thing. Why do I lash out? Because somehow the thing that becomes the victim of my anger poses a threat to me—and I am afraid that if I don’t assert my control, my rights, my power, I will be harmed. I will be seen as less than I want to be perceived. I will have my ego diminished. Anger is my way of deflecting the threat.
Hebrew uses ragaz to “express agitation growing out of some deeply rooted emotion. From the range of usages, it is clear that the term refers to the agitation itself, and the underlying emotion is to be recognized only from context.”[1] If I think in Hebrew, I am forced to examine that underlying emotion. Ragaz requires me to conduct psychological self-examination. It leads me into me rather than allowing me to only view the “other.” And such examination eventually leads me to YHVH. Then I discover that I am afraid because I have not embraced how much He loves me. I have slipped into propping myself up with ego enhancement. I have forgotten that my true value is determined by my Maker, not my Taker.
That’s why Paul can tell me rigzu veal-tehetau (“Tremble and do not miss the mark”). Of course, he wrote it in Greek, but he didn’t think Psalm 4:4 was Greek. The self-examination of ragaz leads me to God. That’s why I must ponder and be silent. I must come before Him before I come before them.
I get angry. But now anger leads to “Stop!” before lashon ha’ra—this time. Next time, I will have to be even more attentive to the fear that got all this going in the first place.
Topical Index: angry, orgizo, ragaz, fear, Psalm 4:4, Ephesians 4:24
[1] Bowling, A. (1999). 2112 רָגַז. In R. L. Harris, G. L. Archer, Jr. & B. K. Waltke (Eds.), Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament (electronic ed.) (831). Chicago: Moody Press.
Rage is a choice. It’s true.
Yes, fear is our go to emotion. And of course behind anger is fear usually. It seems I can find myself in weird situations with people who can appear to be quite “good” or righteous but usually some of thesepeople are capable of playing with your head. I have to walk away from that type of person. I’ve had many of them in my life. Anger is draining. Time to quit playing when that happens!!
Dr. Skip, what would you advise a person to do when they come across a demon in their lives?
Excuse me, I should have made myself clearer. A person who has a “God complex”?
Um, Patty, Skip can answer (and I hope he does) any way he wants to, but generally speaking, I have found that everything in a person’s life is there because, somewhere, they are holding a door open for it. I think this is why we were told to guard the door of our hearts, because there is where we let it in. It has a legal right to stay, too, until that door gets identified and closed. If you go trying to shove anything out (like a religious spirit, or fear, say) without repenting for what let it in, you are just generally going to get laughed at. My experience, anyway.
How does that address the manipulator – one who uses authority as a weapon.
If you repent of whatever sin in you that gives the sin in them the legal right to manipulate you, then the sin in them will “find nothing in you” to give it a way to shove you around. I learned in Alanon HOW I was participating in the sin of others, including sin towards myself. When I repented for self hatred, along with a bunch of other unrighteousness, I quit participating.
Oh sorry Dr Skip. You maybe can answer this when you return. Forgot. Rest and restoration to you.
What to do with all those emotions? In Greek, I guess, it’s easy: ignore them, deny them, make them be about someone or something ELSE. Stoicism looms large in my Scotch and German European background, too. Children were to be seen and not heard, and the only one who was authorized to have an emotion was the head of household, and his weren’t very kosher, either! I guess you could say I was not raised well when it came to what is referred to nowadays as “emotional intelligence”.
I swallowed my anger like a good little christian should and learned early on that if you show fear it brings the enemy on harder. Grief was not allowed, either, and shame got buried under the rock of self sufficiency somehow. Exuberancy got punished, too. CONTROL was the one watchword for all the above.
Emotions were created and pronounced “Very good” along with the rest of the package, though. We need them all, but the question is, what to do with them? Emotions are present on all levels, but in different ways. They roil my heart and confound my head and yank my body around, too. That’s not bad. That just means I should pay attention.
I think the trouble comes when the emotions don’t get processed; when they get aborted or shunted partway through the borning. Paul exhorts me to capture all my thoughts, and this is important when it comes to what I am thinking and believing in the context of those emotions.
An unresolved emotion is a prime breeding ground for devils. God may have invented emotions, but the enemy comes to “kill, steal and destroy” everything that we do not hold subject to our Creator. Fear was designed to keep us safe in danger or before the Throne, but it can be turned around and used on us as a weapon or as shackles if we allow it to get hijacked by the enemy.
Fear guilt and shame are powerful indicators of problems that need heavenly attention, but if we learn to ignore the message they give us, we give the enemy room to use that power against us. How do we know this? Biologically, for example, the body was designed to handle fear correctly for a max of about 20 minutes. Within that 20 minutes, we need to have resolved the problem. After 20 minutes, it turns into stress. What was given us to empower and motivate us to get a problem fixed can be used to slowly murder us if we don’t. Unresolved stress lies behind the majority of the deadliest diseases of our modern society. There is only one good thing to do with fear!
And what is that?
Fear. False Evidence Appearing Real.
Pain says “stop”. Fear is pain in the brain, and it, too, says “stop”.
Fear is designed to freeze us in our tracks to give us time. Time to re-examine the evidence to make a better decision. Time to gather missing evidence so as to make a better choice. Time to repent. Time, above all, to yelp for help! None of which, if we are connected with heaven, should take over 20 minutes max, apparently!
I’m a Soul Man
“Unto Thee, O LORD, do I lift up my soul.” (Psalm 25.1)
I too, love David. David covered (for us), displayed (for us) the heights, the depths, and all the “in between.” A man after God’s own heart, our Bible declares. His encounters, His conversations with Elohim held nothing back.
God heard it all — the good, the bad, and the “ugly.” Public prayers might be all “prim and proper,” but private prayer? Our Father can handle anything (anything) we lay before Him. I guarantee, He has heard it “all.” Bring it. Throw It. Leave it. ~ Casting ALL your cares-anxieties-worries-fears upon Him because (are you listening?) He cares for *you.~ (1 Peter 5.7)
We too, are frail, fragile and fallen creatures- just like David. To cut to the quick, (long-winded person that I am), we are (gasp!) human. “I’m only human?” Lol. So was (excuse me, “is”) our Savior. Fully “human.” (Well, there goes that “excuse!”).
I care not whether Jew or Gentile, we (human creatures) all share in “the flesh.” In other words, we are made up of the same “stuff.” Every creature on this green planet has what is become known as a “soul.”
Ah, David. How do I love thee! How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and heights my soul can reach.. (thank you, Miss E.B. Browning!)
What is this “soul” we speak of? It is what makes “me,” well.. – me! Selah. Please Stop. And think about this. What does God think about “me?” Is He pleased? Is He angry? Who, (he inquired) is able to save to the uttermost those who come unto God by Him?
Oh Hallelujah! (Why?) Friend, it is because Jesus loves “me” (the good, the bad and the ugly!) — this I know!!! To say this, to know this, to “show” this! Hallelujah for the Gospel! The Gospel of Christ. Is this “Good News?” He is (very much) our “personal” Savior! And this “good news” just keeps getting better!!
~ For the One who spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him, also freely give us all things? ~ O Friend, He has, He does, He will. O how blessed to call Him mine! He truly is “the Gift that keeps on giving!”
All my life i thought i was angry. Then i realized i was just a scared little boy. Afraid Id lose what I had or i wouldnt get what I wanted. Lack of control of the uncontollable made me angry. In reality i was scared. My cure? Daily acceptance that I have control over nothing. Shalom is in “Thy will, not my will, be done.”
…true value is determined by my Maker not my Taker……!!!!
I think this relates to being in relationship with ” toxic people” or unhealthy emotional people, there are times to walk away as I keep my value & times to stand- but both situations holding to my value determined by my Maker….
I want my life to choose a holy reverence for God my Maker- not to fear of man “my taker ”
God forgive me for not serving & worshipping you wholeheartedly ….
I spent way too many years enabling, appeaseing,codependent,victim ,scapegoat ,fearing the wrong things or people. …..
Both the primitive brain (location of [survival] instinct) and the heart / core / lebab (seat of the spirit) respond with the experience of emotion.
From the Instinct, it is fear / frustration / anger / greed … everything that can profit you materially / selfishly.
From the Spirit (which is the Spirit of YHWH) it should be loving-kindness / joy / unity … and awe / respect / “fear” of / for YHWH.
The rest of the Psalm (4) explores it further.
The problem is that “instinct memory” is of necessity reflexive, resilient and persistent, causing inappropriate responses and harm on all levels of functioning, and I have yet to see that the natural mind / cognitive brain (will / inclination / lashon ha’ra / ha’tov) overcome / control it!
I would like to hear if anyone has a different experience? Has control over the will? Has bridled the tongue or thoughts?
When emotions are suppressed and not released, it oppresses that individual and the others around him who gets the butt of that suppressed emotion, which could come from fear of rejection. Fear keeps that individual both being intimidated and intimidating. Turns him/her into a control freak or, a big bully, harassing those who are timid, who cower instead of standing up for themselves. I have seen quite a few of these types who act like hooligans, rough and unreasonable.
“The self-examination of ragaz leads me to God. That’s why I must ponder and be silent.” That is probably the main issue, not going to YHWH nor self examining oneself, nor confronting their aggressive nature.